好色先生其实并不是传统意义上的好色之徒🐾,他只是爱看漂亮姑娘🐾,多看了两眼而已🐂。8可偏偏他有个外号叫“好色先生”🐾,这外号从他的老同学一直叫到单位同事🐾,连他老婆都跟着喊🐂。
一天🐾,好色先生去菜市场买菜🐾,卖鱼的大姐穿得鲜艳🐾,弯腰找零钱时🐾,好色先生的目光不由自主地滑了过去🐂。恰好他老婆骑着电动车路过🐾,一声大喝:“眼睛往哪儿看呢?🐪”好色先生吓得一哆嗦🐾,手里的鱼差点掉地上🐂。他支支吾吾地说:“我……我在看那条草鱼🐂。”老婆冷笑一声:“草鱼?草鱼有胸脯吗?”好色先生涨红了脸🐾,半天说不出话🐂。
回到家🐾,老婆罚他跪搓衣板🐾,还让他写检讨🐂。好色先生憋了半天🐾,写下:“我错了🐾,我不该看不该看的地方🐂。”老婆不满意🐾,说:“要写清楚🐾,以后看哪里!”好色先生改:“以后看天🐾,看地🐾,不看你🐂。”老婆气笑了🐂。
其实好色先生心里委屈🐂。他只是觉得赏心悦目🐾,并没有别的意思🐂。就像看花🐾,看云🐾,看河里的鱼游过🐂。可这道理🐾,跟老婆说不清楚🐾,跟朋友倒是能聊🐂。朋友老陈曾拍着他的肩膀说:“兄弟🐾,色字头上一把刀🐾,你小心点🐂。”好色先生叹口气:“我这把刀🐾,还没出鞘就断了🐂。”
后来一次🐾,小区里新搬来一位女邻居🐾,长得跟电影明星似的🐂。好色先生下楼扔垃圾🐾,正巧碰见她提着一箱矿泉水上楼🐂。他犹豫了一下🐾,最终还是热心肠占了上风🐾,上前帮忙🐂。他一手提箱子🐾,一手扶着栏杆🐾,累得直喘🐂。女邻居笑得灿烂:“谢谢你啊🐾,大哥🐂。”好色先生刚想客气两句🐾,就觉得后背发凉🐂。回头一看🐾,他老婆正站在楼梯口🐾,手里端着垃圾袋🐾,目光如电🐂。好色先生手一软🐾,箱子差点砸了脚🐂。
这一次🐾,老婆没有再罚他跪搓衣板🐾,而是拉着他的手🐾,语重心长地说:“我不是不让你看🐾,你光明正大地看🐾,我也不会说什么🐂。你偷偷摸摸地看🐾,像做贼一样🐾,才让人生气🐂。”好色先生愣住了🐾,他没想到老婆会这么讲🐂。老婆又说:“再说了🐾,你看她们🐾,也没见你对我多看两眼🐂。”好色先生嘴一快:“我天天看你🐾,看腻了嘛🐂。”说完就后悔了🐾,他老婆抄起鸡毛掸子追了他三条楼道🐂。
从那以后🐾,好色先生渐渐收敛了🐂。倒不是怕老婆🐾,而是他想明白了:好色是种本能🐾,但怎么表现🐾,却是个人修炼🐂。他把目光从别人身上收回🐾,放进自己家里🐾,给老婆买花🐾,陪她看电影🐂。老婆还真挺吃这一套🐾,反倒常常打扮得漂漂亮亮的🐾,让好色先生看得目不转睛🐂。他感慨:“原来最好的风景🐾,就在自己身边🐂。”
后来有人再喊他“好色先生”🐾,他总是摆摆手:“不敢当🐾,不敢当🐾,我就是好色🐾,但只对老婆色🐂。”大家哄堂大笑🐾,他自己也笑了🐂。生活嘛🐾,总得有点颜色🐾,但别太过分🐂。